Our lesson in church last Sunday was on honesty. And honestly, some of the discussion really bothered me and has continued to fester in my head. So now I can't sleep until I throw it out there to the Universe and release it.
Most of us believe we have a good handle on what's honest but I want to question that a bit. As the discussion turned to being honest in our words and thoughts I feel the lesson took a horrible turn. You see, people wanted to justify not being totally honest because it can hurt feelings. It's commonly called being brutally honest. But is it really honesty at all? Some talked about not really telling people what you thought of their clothes or how fat they looked. One woman even mentioned that you wouldn't tell a woman that her baby was ugly. Do you really consider that honesty to even be thinking that in the first place? I would consider it more judgmental than honest.
Think of it this way. To God that baby is absolutely beautiful. To that mother who has waited so long to have that child, that baby is absolutely beautiful. I have an amazing, and very handsome son. I would have LOVED to have more children, but my husband didn't want to as much as I did. Any child that I would be blessed to have would be absolutely beautiful to me. So are they really being honest in thinking that way or are they looking at that child through worldly eyes?
And the person in the not-so-flattering clothing? We all have our own opinions of what looks good and who are we to say what is right for someone else. Honest or judgmental? Personally, I could stand to lose 30 pounds (again), my nose is pretty big, my ears are even bigger, I color my hair interesting colors at times. Speaking of hair, I used to have a lot more of it so it was easy back then to do pretty things with it. Through a series of stressful events over the last few years I'm now down to a third of what I used to have. I don't have money to spend on clothes so everything I own comes off the clearance rack. So by some people's standards, I'm not that pretty, or fashionable, or thin. But I know that to God I am still beautiful.
A few years back I saw a man walking across the street in Salt Lake. His thin body was deformed so he was bent over to one side and had difficulty walking. But there he was, crossing the street dressed in a nice dress shirt and pants, walking with his head held high and looking very confident. Down a couple more blocks I then saw a man with a large muscular body crossing the street. As he crossed the street he smoked his cigarette. Now by the world's standards the first man would not be considered an attractive man. Is that an honest opinion of the man? I saw two men who had both been blessed with a body. The first one was proud of the body he had been given and was taking care of it to the best of his ability. The second man, not so much. Where's the real honesty?
So there's my soap box. Don't get me wrong, this is not something I am perfect in. This is a lesson as much for me as anyone else who chooses to look at it. Sometimes we hide behind our own judgmental opinions by calling it brutal honesty. But if we choose not to look at the world and the people in it through human eyes but by the light of Christ instead, we just might see things differently and find real honesty. Excuse me for being brutally honest ;)
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
Saturday, April 2, 2011
Once a Soccer Mom, Always a Soccer Mom
It's that time of year when I wax nostalgic. The sun is starting to shine again, the days are getting warmer, trees are budding and flowers are sprouting up. But my favorite thing about this time of year would be the sights and sounds of soccer season. The cheering. The whistles blowing. The orange slices at halftime and the donuts after. I love this time of year. You see, I'm a soccer player AND a soccer mom. The best of both worlds. I have played all my life, and am still playing soccer. Yes, I'm in my forties and I am still loving soccer. But being a soccer mom is just as much fun to me. I have seen moms putting comments on Facebook today about how fun their kids games were. I have also in the past seen moms complain about being a soccer mom. My son turns 21 in a couple of months and I totally miss being the full-time soccer mom. I still go to some of his indoor games, and have even played on a couple of indoor teams WITH him, but it's not the same. So I'm going to share some of my soccer mom memories with anyone who will listen (or read).
I bought my son his first soccer ball before he was born. Poor kid didn't have a chance.
As soon as my son could walk he was dribbling the soccer ball. By the time he was two I was kicking the ball at him and making him dive on it. I figured the worst position he could play was goalie and I didn't want him to have any fear of the ball. Good thing since he ended up as the Varsity goalie at his high school.
He played on his first team when he was 4. No, he didn't have the killer instinct yet. Instead , he would watch his shadow or chase blowing leaves across the field. Then he would suddenly notice the game was going on, run over, take the ball down and score. Then go back to chasing leaves.
And my son has always been a sucker for girls, even on the soccer field. One game I watched him pick a dandelion in the middle of a game, spit on it, then give it to a girl on the other team. Awww shucks!
He did get more serious and more emotional about soccer. The big guys were really hard on him because he could dribble circles around them. But after getting teary-eyed he'd get real mad.
When he was eleven, he was scoring on average 6 goals a game. He was unstoppable. One game was against a team coached by our neighbor. As I was sitting on the sidelines watching the game, a mom from the other team told the coach that she heard my son was so good because his mom had played semi-pro soccer. Astonished, my neighbor turned to me and asked if it was true. Unfortunately not, but it made me smile. My son had become the stuff of legends!
High school soccer was tough on this soccer mom. Goalie is the loneliest spot on the field. That first game that the coach pulled the varsity goalie and put my son in was terrifying. It was his junior year and he was the varsity goalie from there on out. The team went from last place to being in a 3-way tie for a spot in the playoffs. My son was awarded the Impact Player of the Year by his coach.
Oh but we're not done yet. My son practiced last year with the Weber State team and I'm sure he'll be playing with them in no time. He's a determined kid. Good thing, 'cause I'm not ready to give up the title of soccer mom. Enjoy it while it lasts ladies, because you'll miss it when it's gone. Now where are those orange slices?
I bought my son his first soccer ball before he was born. Poor kid didn't have a chance.
As soon as my son could walk he was dribbling the soccer ball. By the time he was two I was kicking the ball at him and making him dive on it. I figured the worst position he could play was goalie and I didn't want him to have any fear of the ball. Good thing since he ended up as the Varsity goalie at his high school.
He played on his first team when he was 4. No, he didn't have the killer instinct yet. Instead , he would watch his shadow or chase blowing leaves across the field. Then he would suddenly notice the game was going on, run over, take the ball down and score. Then go back to chasing leaves.
And my son has always been a sucker for girls, even on the soccer field. One game I watched him pick a dandelion in the middle of a game, spit on it, then give it to a girl on the other team. Awww shucks!
He did get more serious and more emotional about soccer. The big guys were really hard on him because he could dribble circles around them. But after getting teary-eyed he'd get real mad.
When he was eleven, he was scoring on average 6 goals a game. He was unstoppable. One game was against a team coached by our neighbor. As I was sitting on the sidelines watching the game, a mom from the other team told the coach that she heard my son was so good because his mom had played semi-pro soccer. Astonished, my neighbor turned to me and asked if it was true. Unfortunately not, but it made me smile. My son had become the stuff of legends!
High school soccer was tough on this soccer mom. Goalie is the loneliest spot on the field. That first game that the coach pulled the varsity goalie and put my son in was terrifying. It was his junior year and he was the varsity goalie from there on out. The team went from last place to being in a 3-way tie for a spot in the playoffs. My son was awarded the Impact Player of the Year by his coach.
Oh but we're not done yet. My son practiced last year with the Weber State team and I'm sure he'll be playing with them in no time. He's a determined kid. Good thing, 'cause I'm not ready to give up the title of soccer mom. Enjoy it while it lasts ladies, because you'll miss it when it's gone. Now where are those orange slices?
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